Izak Smells | Page 3 of 106 | Comics every Mon/Wed/Fri


Nier Automata – 2B – 8bit Pixel Art

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I came out of retirement to bring you 2B, from Nier Automata, a game released by Square Enix earlier in the year for the PS4, and just the other day on PC. I might pick it up as a gift to myself after the wedding, depending on whether I find something cooler in the meantime.

You can now buy this as a sticker!

The game has three playable characters, but I think YoRHa No.2 Type B (2B) is everyone’s favourite. The other two are YoRHa No. 9 Type S (9S) and YoRHa Type A No.2 (A2) who I might draw later.

the main controversy of the game came when a photoshopped screengrab from the trailer gave 2b a rather accurate butthole, brown circle and all. The original image was just a regular panty shot you can expect from any Japanese made game.

However the game designer yoko Taro couldn’t help but make fun of the situation. From a translated tweet he said this:

“Due to the 2B butt controversy, many outrageous drawings are being made. Collecting them to share individually is a pain. I’d like it if I could get them sent in a zip file every week.”

Of course, when you leave a challenge like that floating out for your fans to collect you zips full of Hentai the people were more than willing to oblige.

“After saying ‘send me zips of 2B art’ word got around and I actually got a zip. The Internet is great.”

Murray Ball

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We’ve just found out that we’ve lost Murray Ball, a comics legend here in New Zealand. Footrot Flats (as well as Stanley, which were much harder to find) inspired both Becky and I to do what we do today.

His comics captured rural New Zealand in a way no other artist could. muddy fields, tussock, cabbage trees and rugged native bush pervaded his strips. He made our landscape iconic in a way.

He then gave it a soul with his lovable characters, Wall, Dog, Cooch, Horse, Rangi, and Cheeky Hobson.

My brother Ben collected the editions religiously, including the puppy dog miniature editions. I remember they were policed strictly due to the fact I was a kid, and anything put near a kid may as well get thrown into a fire. So when I could I’d beg mum to buy me a copy when we were at a second hand store. To this day, whenever I find a second hand book store I’ll go to the comics section and pick up the inevitable Murray Ball book lurking there.

The box now contains both our collections and sits in my spare room beside my own comics I’ve created.

Murray Ball, we’ll miss you.

120km Ground Based Journey In Elite: Dangerous

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I spend most of my time in Elite: Dangerous these days just ferrying people between two systems on the edge of human occupied space, otherwise known as The Bubble. I’m on the edge so the people who need transporting have only one route out of there. That means I visit the same two systems over and over. One, a space station in 64 Arietis called Weyn Dock and the other a planetary outpost called Salak Prospect in the nearby Independent system of Arietis Sector DQ-Y C19 on the moon DQ-Y C19 1 A.

On a good day my flight to Salak Prospect has me flying over a mountain range putting me directly in line with the large landing pads. This is usually about the time Salak Prospect is entering the daylight side of the planet on it’s 18.8 Day rotation around it’s parent DQ-Y C19 1, the closest planet to the systems Class K star.

The mountain range has always held me in awe as I fly over it. And it’s always presented itself as some sort of a challenge, just begging for the human will to conquer to well, conquer it. Sharp eyed readers will notice that I’m not landing at a the larger landing pad, but rather a medium one. I’ll get to that later.

However just beyond it is two craters. One, fairly regular, the other with a protrusion at it’s center, like a nipple or a water droplet caught in slow motion. In the below picture you can see it as the darkest and largest crater in the middle of the image below the mountain range. Salak prospect is on the opposite side of the range on the right hand edge.

Here’s a closer view of it, with me passing over it with my workhorse Keelback, loaded with two vehicle hangers as well as a fighter bay, for quick reckon work. I’m a rookie when it comes to planetary exploration. So I packed two Scarab SRV’s (Surface Reckon Vehicle).

My clever idea was that I’d park up at Salak Prospect and drive from there to the crater, and if I needed it, call in my second scarab if the first one got ruined.

The catch however is that the crater is a 120km straight trip as the Eagle flies. In the below image you can see what I’d have to go through. Meniscus  is on the left hand side while Salak prospect is the scraggly little dots on the bottom right.

The planet has just recently hit the daylight side. So I reckon that gives me a decent amount of time to complete the journey if I have to do it over multiple sessions. I know nighttime isn’t THAT bad, but I’d prefer not to work in it anyway.

I set out at 8:54:03 according to my system clock. In the image below I go around to the right of the main outpost building and go up a slightly less drastic incline.

One of the first things I see on the way up is a cargo capsule rolling down the hill. Someone needs to do something about all this garbage.

I use the parent planet as a guiding point to follow towards my destination.

I spend the first part of this journey getting to 85% hull integrity on my SRV.

It was at this point at 9:24:50 I call it quits for the night (Feb 14) and don’t pick up the journey again till Feb 19, 4:01:04. I whip out my ship launched fighter and take a quick look around just to get my bearings and see how the constellations have moved around. I do my best to take off and land in exactly the same spot. It’s a little difficult due to how bad the terrain is. But I manage.

I keep DQ-Y C19 1 slightly on my left (but within sight) from here on out, which roughly gives me the right direction to go in. I could use the coordinates but I’m not great with numbers and like to do everything by sight. Would be nice to lay down landmark flags or something to follow though.

My newly repaired vehicle quickly prangs and isn’t so spotless anymore.

I reach my first basen and think to myself “Wow, this trip isn’t going to take long at all, it’ll just be over that range in front of me!” I then proceed to roll down the mountain.

I come across my first skimmers, protecting cans of coffee and other detritus. Not my interest so I carry on, giving them a wide berth.

I hit 50% fuel on my first SRV and it’s at this point I realise I might be in trouble. I do some quick calculations and realise I might run out of fuel about 20km or so out from the crater.

I decide I’ll let that be future Izak’s problem and quickly find a downed probe and take a couple selfies.

I’m only 40km away from Salak and I’ve got less than half a tank of gas in my first SRV, and no discernible way to refuel. Did I mention I was a rookie?

I jump on the Galnet and discover that I can in fact refuel via mining rocks and processing sulphur and phosphorous. Pity I can’t find any god damn rocks on this rock!

I wimp out, frustrated, and call in the ship for my replacement SRV.

At this point I take the opportunity to go about 4 or 5km up in my fighter to get a quick look at how far I’ve got to go. Doesn’t look bad! Maybe I’ll be able to make it on my second tank after all. Maybe. If maths suddenly decide to cut me a brake.

From this point onward I follow the arm of the milky way, slicing up from the horizon, as my guide. I set out resolutely hoping I’ll find resources along the way. I’ve spent a couple hours on this trip now and I don’t want to screw it up.

Using the SRV’s radar I find a couple mineable outcrops full of nothing useful. Got elements for repairs though!

I also find another probe, this one protected, and get a bit of a warning. I skedaddle because I don’t want to get into a tussle.

I finally find enough resources for refueling, I have enough for a couple tanks. Until now I was getting pretty frustrated and abusive at my SRV’s constant spin outs. But now that I have a safe amount of fuel, I’m happy. So happy in fact I take a photo of the pattern I made getting all the precious rocks.

Shortly after I get my first ground level view of the crater. A wide flat expanse is before me and with a recently repaired SRV, I gun it with reckless abandon, doing massive jumps along the way.

I smash my hull to below 50%, but I’m undeterred. Suddenly I’m making my way down the inside lip of the crater. The nipple is still about 18km away.

Undeterred…

It looks like there’s already some sort of human presence in the crater already.

As I approach the nipple I see something is already on it. Another wreck probably.

System Defence Force? Are you kidding me? Parked all the way out here. And look at that angle. As I take the photo my SRV slides backwards down the slope.

I’ve done it! I’ve made it to the top of the highest point of Meniscus Basin (as I’m going to call it) and completed my journey! Salak Prospect is registering as 118km away but I’m going to call it a nice even 120km to make up for all my zig zagging. The time of completion is 7:14:41.

That means I was on the road for about 3 hours and 45 minutes. I usually idled my SRV in the 0.18g gravity at about 10m/s. This kept me flat on the ground most of the time.

The exact Co-ordinates of Meniscus Basin is 5.3596° -75.8978° for those interested in checking it out.

My beauty shots didn’t register at the time of completion. So I logged back in a day later and took photos of where I left off. The shadows have deepened as the sun makes its way down to the horizon.

Would I do it again? I’m not sure. I’d need new sites to check out. But it was certainly fun, and broke up my usual play. The music that accompanied me along the way was Stellardrone, who I was introduced to through the community.

Thanks for reading!

Life Hack For Discerning Gentlemen #1

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There comes a time in a mans life when he shall partake of a deuce in the company of a women. Not in the boudoir, but rather the shitter adjacent.

Now, if your diet is high in fat, you shall find that your excrement shall occasionally float. In such an instance, flushing the poor fellow to his doom may be out of the question, due its plucky attitude to sinking.

There is nothing to be done at this moment but to grab a piece of toilet paper and delicately lay it over the top of the stool as if it were a burial shroud.

Leave and then hope that the next person doesn’t notice the surprise you’ve left, although I have to admit, this may be too optimistic a hope.

Win a Book We’re In!

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So we had the honour of contributing a couple words to our friend Zee’s book. It’s for kids looking to get into writing and arting. Our contributions were in the writing one, which I know may be a little confusing considering IZS is mostly known for its pictures, but Kristof does some stellar work here and that shouldn’t go and get forgotten!

We have these two gorgeous books by Z.R. Southcombe up for grabs today! Leave a comment below to enter the draw, and if…

Posted by New Zealand Book Council on Monday, February 13, 2017

The New Zealand Book Council is doing a giveaway at this very moment which you can get involved in. You could enter for a kid you know who’s creativity you want to nurture, or even your own! There’s no cut-off for these sorts of things.

Personally I’m pretty amped, and so is Hubert.

 

Passing Shits

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I said something about “Passing ships in the night” to Becky earlier this week in the morning while she was still waking up. She thought I was talking about passing shits in the night. Which was so hilarious I had to draw it. However I think  the drawing doesn’t play off the double entendre very well. So if you can visualise it better, have a go!

Our boss was wondering if the comic I do at work should be sponsored by a famous sausage company here in NZ. As a pitch I sent him this. I think it’ll be a real hit.

Finally, Becky, Kristof, and I (plus hidden fourth band member Matt gets an honourable mention) will be in a book being made by Zenobia Southcombe called I Am A Writer. She had this lovely thing to say about us as she’s working on it.

I'm doing the last bits of formatting for "I Am A Writer". One of the writers in the book is a team of three comic…

Posted by Z.R. Southcombe on Thursday, February 2, 2017

So Hubert had to show his appreciation.

In other news, I saw three empty bottles by a lamppost yesterday. One of the bottles had rolled a few feet away from the others. An older desk jocky was walking past, saw the bottle that had escaped and picked it up. He then returned it to the other two on the ground. Mission accomplished. He was pretty chuffed with himself.

I charged in front of him in the vain hope I’d see three cigarette butts vaguely clustered together. I wanted to show him I too could arrange rubbish in an aesthetically pleasing way on the ground. Alas, I couldn’t find anything so I just emptied my pocket lint out in front of him instead. Garnishing the ground with it.

That was all true apart from the pocket lint bit.

Headline Strips

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A lot of my comics recently have revolved around Trump, as has everything really. To start off, inoculate yourself with these hips. I wanted to play with flat colours a bit in a format that might look good on Instagram, a platform I neglect far too much.

I know that I don’t want to see my own tax returns, so who gives a shit about Trump’s? What sort of people are these? I mean, we know they’re dodgy anyway. But if you got a look at them, would you even be able to figure that out?

Suddenly people that were standing against the TPPA found an unlikely ally in Trump. It starts to make you wonder, if he’s against it, maybe it was good after all?

This was just a bizarre strip that wasn’t going to fit with the regular stuff on IZS. Also my colouring looks like barf.

A new face on the scene is riding the populist politics wave that Trump has made ripples of around the world. Gareth Morgan has even riffed off Trump’s catchphrase “Make America Great Again” with the far more conservative catchphrase “Make New Zealand Fair Again.” We don’t like to overblow things in this country.

Also the dude on the bottom right looks like he belongs on Rick & Morty.

Child abuse in New Zealand in the form of “Isolation Rooms” made headlines a while ago. They’re like a run up for the inhumane isolation chambers they’ll be spending their adulthood in. With that in mind I riffed on an even more cruel and unusual punishment.

When you’re on Facebook you’ll notice definite trends among your friends. Great waves of 21sts followed by proposals and new jobs. After that it’s weddings and incessant baby photos. Then of course, death.

Drawing On The Job

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Hey guys, here’s another art dump! First off, check out this character concept I did for the comic called Hackjob the Hedgehog. I’ve floated him out to Kristof, but decent comics containing this guy aren’t forthcoming. So in the meantime, just stare at this guy and laugh at all the possibilities we can’t think of.

Nile came up with the glasses, when he drifted up behind me at work and asked what I was doing.

I’ve contorted my roll at work into something I actually want to be doing, which is drawing more. The long hours at work mean that I have little time for it when I get home, which usually leaves me grumpy, and Becky hates dealing with that sort of shit.

Here’s one I did for a piece on annoying airline passengers.

And another about money shit.

How Do I Find Out If My House Is Haunted?

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I often get asked, “Professional person, I just got a new house and I’m worried it might be stuffed full of fucking spooks. How do I definitively confirm whether or not this is the case?”

So I can stop copy pasting my answers around Reddit and Yahoo Answers I’ve decided to compile my technique all in one place. I hope it helps.

Get a Bucket of Water

The first thing you’re going to need is a bucket of water, about a foot deep. Ideally the bucket will be able to fit a watermelon in it.

Buy a watermelon

Go to the store and buy a watermelon. If you tap it with your knuckle it should make a hollow sound which means it’s ripe. But that isn’t important for what we’re trying to achieve.
Put the Watermelon in the Bucket

Gingerly place the watermelon inside your bucket of water. Careful! Some of the water might get displaced and slop out onto your floor. Maybe do this in your bathroom or kitchen. If the watermelon fits, fantastic! If it doesn’t you’re going to need to buy a bigger bucket and repeat this step. You should now no longer need the watermelon.

Have a Friend Around

Ghost hunting is a lot more fun with a friend, and they’ll come in useful in the following steps!
Put your head in the bucket

Hold your head under the water for no longer than 22 minutes and 22 seconds. If you hold it there any longer than that you’ve just broken a world record! Forget about your haunted house, you just made history! You want to hold your head under the water until it results in your own drowning. You may need to get your friend to help you hold your head under there because your survival reflexes will start kicking in pretty hard after a while! Watch out! You might spill more water at this point. Make sure you have towels down.

Note: The watermelon should no longer be in the bucket.

Take a Look Around

At this point your soul will begin untangling itself from its Flesh Net. If your house is haunted you should be able to see spirits or bald apparitions with spirals of teeth surrounding it’s head bulb. If you see these your house is haunted.

Get Your Friend To Revive You

Now that you’ve had a look around it’s time to bind your soul back up with your Flesh Net. You’ll feel very at peace at this step, but it’s important that you fuse with your Pain & Suffering Conductor. Your friend should google a Youtube video on resuscitation before attempting this step.

Note: Ask them to do the revive before you ask them to hold your head under the water. But make sure they drown you before the revival.

To be clear:

  1. Ask your friend that after they help you drown they should immediately begin attempting to bring you back to life.
  2. Drown yourself.
  3. Look around for spirits while simultaneously being revived.
  4. Do not attempt to resuscitate the watermelon.

Take Stock

After all this you should have a clear idea of whether or not your house is haunted, unless it was built on a lay line. In which case your home is part of the spiritual superhighway, sorry.

Note: If your friend isn’t good at resuscitation your house is probably haunted now. Thanks for reading and I hoped this helped a little.